Him: I'm taking you somewhere special tonight. Me: where!? Him: mcdonalds
Me: I'm just sitting here trying to cook my hardboiled egg. Him: that's not cooking it, you just put it in hot water.
Me: (whipping out my change purse) him: ew put that away. You're embarrassing me!
I added a pic of my expensive change purse.
(An hour into the movie footloose) him: I didn't know this was a dancing movie.
"I'm not for or against abortion cuz everyone I'd like to see aborted is already here." -my history professor
my buddy’s response as to why the girl he hooked up with was a “weirdo”
“First off she gets naked for money. she weighs 114 pounds and can drink more than me. she has a cat named n**** and a dog named pica pikachu.” -Lee Roy Mallari
“You’ve got good friends. I like them. I don’t think they would f*** your girlfriend, if you had one.”
-Justin Halpern’s dad on friendship
"that bitch was fucking chasing me naked." -Jordie Travi
" I had fun even if the guys were butt ass ugly."- Jordie Travi
" I tried doing a yoga class. I hadn't been in some of those positions since the night of senior prom." -Brett
(Normal dinners with my family) " pass me the salt before I break your leg"
"she shows up looking like bobo the clown and leaves looking like lucifer."
-ricky azevedo
 |
| My change purse! |
No comments:
Post a Comment